Quest for a perfect martini

[cdave]

Sweet martini: 3/4 pars gin, 1/8 part dry vermouth, 1/8 part sweet vermouth.

Medium martini: 4/5 part gin. 1/5 part vermouth

Dry martini: 5/6 parts gin 1/6 part vermouth

Glass martini: Swirl vermouth and ice in a glass. Discard. Add gin.

Breath martini: Drink a shot of vermouth. Breath into a glass. Add gin.

Los Alamos martini: Place a bottle of vermouth on top of an atomic bomb test. Place a glass of gin downwind.

Churchill martini: Pour a glass of gin, while glancing angrily across the room at a sealed bottle of vermouth.

Ideal martini: A glass of gin drunk whilst looking at a picture of vermouth.

Inspired by comments on demiurgent's post.

{edit}

Ooh! IDEA! Homoeopathic Vermouth.

We could do double blind experiments to discover what the difference between no vermouth, and probably no vermouth is.

Of course we'd need a large sample base :)

Comments

[bugshaw.livejournal.com]

The only time I've had vermouth was when a "friend" bought me a bottle of Noilly Prat as a present "because it's got Prat written on it! Har har har!"

Gin. Nom.

[cdave]

I'm not sure I've ever owned a vermouth, despite having a reasonably large liquor collection.

A friend bought me a Fartons Polo snack back from holiday last month for a similar reason.

[watervole.livejournal.com]

LOL! That's funny. I like the Churchill one best.

[cdave]

I heard that one a few months ago on radio4. Ran across the breath martini and Los Alamos one while Googling.

Strictly speaking for the Los Alamos one, all you need to do is raise the glass in the air, as the surviving remnants should be evenly distributed in the atmosphere by now.

[idaho-smith.livejournal.com]

What an odd bit of synchronicity!

I was just talking to a girl online last night and we happened to discover that we're both occasional Martinians:
She favours a "Gin & It" (or a Gin & French, depending on the vermouth) of 2parts Gin: 1 part vermouth.
I favour a "Monty", i.e. the gin-to-vermouth ratio is 15:1, which is the local numerical superiority that General Mongomery (something of a cautious old woman, tactically) liked to have before advancing on Rommel. However, in homage to the Desert Rats it's a "Dusty Monty" - I add a few drops of the olive-brine to the mix.